Every parent who shares children knows the stretch. Thanksgiving, winter break, Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, and New Year's all arrive within about six weeks, often with travel, extended family, and school closures on top. A schedule that runs smoothly the rest of the year can come apart in November, usually over a question nobody thought to answer when the plan was written.

This post explains what Montana law says about holidays in a parenting plan, what to do when your plan is unclear, and how to keep a holiday disagreement from turning into a court fight. It is general information, not legal advice about your plan. If you have a specific problem, the exact wording of your own order is what matters.

What Montana Law Says a Parenting Plan Can Cover

In a Montana dissolution, legal separation, or parenting plan proceeding that involves a child, the parents submit a proposed final parenting plan, and the final plan is incorporated into the decree. The statute that sets out what that plan may contain, MCA § 40-4-234, names holidays specifically. Based on the best interest of the child, a final parenting plan may include provisions for:

  • “a residential schedule specifying the periods of time during which the child will reside with each parent, including provisions for holidays, birthdays of family members, vacations, and other special occasions” (subsection (2)(c));
  • “sanctions that will apply if a parent fails to follow the terms of the parenting plan, including contempt of court” (subsection (2)(g)); and
  • “the method by which future disputes concerning the child will be resolved between the parents, other than court action” (subsection (2)(i)).

Notice what the statute does not do. It does not set a default holiday schedule, such as alternating years or splitting the day. The details are whatever the parents agreed to or the court ordered, which is why two Montana families can have completely different holiday arrangements, and why the first step in any holiday question is always the same.

Start With the Plan, Not the Argument

Before answering a text about Thanksgiving, find the signed plan and read the holiday section. Look for four things:

  • Which holidays are named. Many plans list Thanksgiving and Christmas but say nothing about Christmas Eve, New Year's Eve, or the rest of winter break.
  • Start and end times. “Christmas with Mom” means little without an hour and a place for the exchange.
  • Odd and even years. Alternating schedules are common, and it is easy to misremember whose year it is.
  • Whether holidays override the regular schedule. If the plan does not say, the weekly rotation and the holiday rotation can point to different parents on the same day.

If the plan answers the question, that answer controls, even if it is not what either of you would choose this year. If you both agree to trade days this year, confirm the trade in writing so there is no dispute later about what was agreed. Keep in mind that an informal trade between parents does not change the court order itself.

When the Plan Is Vague or Silent

Vague holiday terms are behind a large share of December disputes. The plan gives “Christmas” to one parent without saying whether that means the 24th, the 25th, or the whole break. Or it never mentions a holiday that has since become important to one side of the family.

Montana law points parents toward resolving these disagreements outside court first. Under MCA § 40-4-234(5), each parent makes day-to-day decisions while the child is with that parent, and when a plan calls for mutual decisions that the parents cannot reach, “the parents shall make a good faith effort to resolve the issue through any dispute resolution process provided for in the final parenting plan.” If your plan names a process, such as mediation, use it, and use it early. A session in October is far easier to arrange than one on December 20.

Skipping that step has a cost. Under MCA § 40-4-212(4)(b), a motion to amend a final parenting plan is presumed vexatious if a parent seeks the amendment “without making a good faith effort to comply with the provisions of the parenting plan or with dispute resolution provisions of the final parenting plan.” That presumption can be overcome, but it is not a position anyone wants to start from.

Do Not Keep the Kids to Even the Score

When one parent returns the children late, or claims a holiday that was not theirs, the instinct is to respond in kind at the next exchange. Montana law answers that directly: “If a parent fails to comply with a provision of the parenting plan, the other parent's obligations under the parenting plan are not affected” (MCA § 40-4-234(6)).

In other words, the other parent's violation does not give you permission for one of your own. Montana courts consider whether a child has frequent and continuing contact with both parents (MCA § 40-4-212(1)(l)). When a court considers amending a plan, it also looks at whether one parent has willfully and consistently attempted to frustrate or deny the other parent's contact with the child (MCA § 40-4-219(1)(a)(iv)). A withheld holiday is exactly the kind of thing that gets raised later.

Keep a factual record of what happened, communicate in writing, and raise the problem through the plan's dispute resolution process or with a lawyer.

Keep the Children Out of the Middle

The statute that states the purpose of a final parenting plan, MCA § 40-4-233, lists among its objectives to “maintain the child's emotional stability and minimize the child's exposure to parental conflict.” Holidays test that more than any other time of year. A few habits help:

  • Handle schedule questions parent to parent, never through the children.
  • Confirm exchange times and locations in writing a week or more ahead, especially when travel or winter roads could change plans.
  • Keep exchanges short and calm, even when there is a conversation you want to have.
  • Let the children enjoy their time in the other household without asking them to report back.

Fixing the Plan for Next Year

If this year's holidays exposed a real gap, the time to fix it is January, while the details are fresh and next Thanksgiving is months away. Useful holiday terms tend to be specific: which holidays are covered, including the eves; exact start and end times; who drives; what happens if weather closes a road; and how the holiday schedule interacts with the regular one.

Parents who agree can work out amended holiday terms together and submit them to the court. When they cannot agree, MCA § 40-4-219 allows a court to amend a prior parenting plan if it finds, based on facts that have arisen since the prior plan or that were unknown to the court when it was entered, “that a change has occurred in the circumstances of the child and that the amendment is necessary to serve the best interest of the child.” One of the things the court considers is whether the parents agree to the amendment. Our guide to modifying a custody order in Montana covers the formal route.

Rewriting holiday terms is a good fit for a cooperative process, because both parents are at the table and the goal is a schedule that works for the children rather than a win. Our cooperative parenting plan page explains that approach, and Cooperative Family Law describes the neutral model A&M uses, in which one firm guides both parents through the process rather than representing either side.

When to Talk to a Lawyer

If a child is in immediate danger, call 911 first. Otherwise, it is worth calling sooner rather than later if the other parent refuses to return the children, if you are worried about a child's safety during a holiday visit, if a parent plans travel the plan does not allow, or if you have been served with a motion about the schedule. Each of those depends on the exact wording of your plan and order, which is where general guidance like this stops being enough.

For other questions that come with the season, from winter crashes to a January divorce, see our winter and holiday legal guide.

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