After the decree, the parenting plan is what governs your family's week. It is a court order, so both parents must follow it, and it is also a practical tool that works only as well as the two of you use it. Montana law gives a few clear rules for daily life under a plan: who decides what, what to do when you disagree, and when a court will step back in. This article covers those rules and some working habits. It is part of our Montana Divorce Guide. (Montana statutes say "parenting" where many people say custody and visitation.)
Who Decides What
The statute draws a line between everyday care and major decisions. "Each parent may make decisions regarding the day-to-day care and control of the child while the child is residing with that parent, and either parent may make emergency decisions affecting the child's safety or health" (MCA § 40-4-234(5)).
Bedtimes, meals, and homework routines at the other house are, within reason, the other parent's call. Major decisions are different. A final plan may allocate decision-making authority over the child's education, spiritual development, and health care (MCA § 40-4-234(2)(h)). Read your plan to see whether those are shared or assigned to one parent. For what a plan contains, see what a parenting plan must include.
Communication That Holds Up
Nothing in the statutes tells parents how to talk to each other. What follows is practice, not law.
- Pick one channel for logistics. Email, a shared calendar, or a co-parenting application all work. The point is that schedule changes live in one place and in writing.
- Keep messages short and about the child. State the issue, propose something specific, and give a reasonable time to respond.
- Do not send messages through the children. They should not carry requests, money, or complaints.
- Share information without being asked. School notices, medical appointments, and activity schedules should reach both homes.
- Assume a judge may read it. Messages between parents can be offered as evidence. See social media and texting during divorce.
If there has been abuse, ordinary co-parenting advice may not be safe. Limited, written-only contact or exchanges through a third party may be more appropriate, and an order of protection may set its own rules. See our Montana Domestic Violence Guide. Anyone in danger should call 911. The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233.
Exchanges
A final plan may include a residential schedule "specifying the periods of time during which the child will reside with each parent," including holidays, birthdays, and vacations (MCA § 40-4-234(2)(c)). Disputes can arise over details the schedule left open: the exact time, the place, who drives, what happens when someone is late.
If your plan is silent on those points, agree on them in writing now, before there is a problem. Be on time, keep the handoff brief and civil, and send the child with what they need. If a change is unavoidable, give as much notice as you can and offer make-up time. None of that is required by statute. All of it shows up later if a court is asked who has made the plan work.
The Dispute Resolution Clause
A Montana parenting plan may include "the method by which future disputes concerning the child will be resolved between the parents, other than court action" (MCA § 40-4-234(2)(i)). That might be mediation, a meeting with a counselor, or another process the two of you chose. See parenting plan dispute resolution clauses.
The clause has teeth. When mutual decision-making is designated but cannot be achieved on an issue, "the parents shall make a good faith effort to resolve the issue through any dispute resolution process provided for in the final parenting plan" (MCA § 40-4-234(5)). And a motion to amend a final plan is presumed vexatious if a parent seeks the amendment "without making a good faith effort to comply with the provisions of the parenting plan or with dispute resolution provisions" (MCA § 40-4-212(4)(b)). The presumption can be rebutted, and it does not apply where it would be contrary to the child's best interest.
| Step | What it looks like |
|---|---|
| 1. Talk or write to each other | Raise the issue in writing, with a specific proposal and a date by which you need an answer. |
| 2. Use the plan's dispute resolution step | If the plan names a process, such as mediation or a parenting counselor, use it. Montana law expects a good faith effort (MCA § 40-4-234(5)). |
| 3. Put any agreement in writing | If you agree to a lasting change, sign it and ask the court to approve it so the order matches what you are doing. |
| 4. Ask the court to amend or enforce | If the process fails, a motion under MCA § 40-4-219 (to amend) or an enforcement motion is the next step. |
There is an important exception. A court may order parents into a dispute resolution process on a motion to amend, but not in cases of physical, sexual, or emotional abuse or threat of abuse by one parent against the other parent or the child, or where a parent has been convicted of certain crimes (MCA § 40-4-219(9)). Court-connected mediation has a similar limit (MCA § 40-4-301(2)).
When the Other Parent Does Not Follow the Plan
The rule here is short: "If a parent fails to comply with a provision of the parenting plan, the other parent's obligations under the parenting plan are not affected" (MCA § 40-4-234(6)). A late support payment does not justify withholding parenting time, and a missed exchange does not justify withholding support.
What the law does provide is consequences through the court. A plan may include sanctions for a parent who fails to follow its terms, including contempt (MCA § 40-4-234(2)(g)). And when a court considers amending a plan, it looks at whether one parent has willfully and consistently refused to allow contact with the other parent or tried to frustrate or deny it. A parent who does that is presumed not to be acting in the child's best interest (MCA § 40-4-219(1)(a)(iv), (3)).
So keep following the order, keep a dated record of what happened, and raise the problem in writing. Our article on when a parent does not follow the plan covers the remedies.
When to Go Back to Court
Children grow, jobs change, and a schedule built for a four-year-old may not fit a teenager. A plan may itself provide for periodic review, for example when the child reaches a certain age (MCA § 40-4-234(2)(f)).
If you cannot agree, the court "may in its discretion amend a prior parenting plan if it finds, upon the basis of facts that have arisen since the prior plan or that were unknown to the court at the time of entry of the prior plan, that a change has occurred in the circumstances of the child and that the amendment is necessary to serve the best interest of the child" (MCA § 40-4-219(1)). Among the things the court weighs are whether the parents agree, and whether a child who is 14 or older wants the change.
Two cautions before you file. The statute says "preference must be given to carrying out the parenting plan" (MCA § 40-4-219(7)). And attorney fees and costs must be assessed against a party who seeks frivolous or repeated amendment, if the court finds the action is vexatious and constitutes harassment (MCA § 40-4-219(5)). A motion should be about a real change in the child's life. For the process, see amending a parenting plan, and for our approach to building plans that last, see cooperative parenting plans.
This page explains Montana law in general as of the 2025 Montana Code Annotated. It is not legal advice about your specific case.